In Proverbs 5-7, Solomon writes to his son to give him advice when it comes to sexual morality. This advice is from God, and it applies to young men of Solomon’s time and of our time. All men are vulnerable to being seduced into immorality, and over the course of time, many have fallen for the trap of sexual immorality and adultery. As Proverbs 7:26 says, speaking of the adulteress/prostitute, “For many are the victims she has cast down, and numerous are all her slain.” Men need to be wary of the seductress because this type of woman knows exactly how to work the way God has designed the male sexual appetite.
The crowning point of God’s creation was man and his God-given companion, the woman. Eve was Adam’s greatest gift and perfect complement. As such, there is great satisfaction and desire that can be met honorably in marriage between a man and a woman. The sexual bond in marriage is powerful and purposefully so as the two become fully one. It is designed by God as a way of mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical oneness between husband and wife. When this intra-marriage bond is used outside of the marriage, it creates bonds where there should not be bonds and hurts the bonds that should be impenetrable. God has condemned any sexual bond outside of marriage because He knows just how destructive it is to those involved in the act and to those hurt by its betrayal of trust. Those who commit sexual immorality spurn God and His will, and the end is destruction (Proverbs 7:27).
When sexual satisfaction and emotional and spiritual harmony are present in a marriage, it is significantly harder to be seduced outside of the marriage. As Proverbs 5:18-19 says, “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth. As a loving hind and a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times; be exhilarated always with her love.” When a husband is exhilarated and enthralled with his wife, he is much less likely to become an adulterer. Similarly, when the wife senses that her husband is enthralled with her, she is much less likely to go and play the seductress with another man. When God’s principles of love, sexual intimacy, honesty, and forbearance are practiced within a marriage, joy can be found. When it is not, disaster is just one false look or conversation away.
Where the seeds of discontent have been sown, the seductress is ready to pounce on her prey. The seductress plays on the felt needs of the man for approval, respect, sexual fulfillment, physical closeness, and fleshly pleasure. She knows how men are wired, and she exploits it to her own advantage and evil purposes. Proverbs 3:5 says, “For the lips of an adulteress drip honey and smoother than oil is her speech.” Proverbs 7:21 adds, “With her many persuasions she entices him; with her flattering lips she seduces him.” Words are a major part of the seduction arsenal as the seductress flatters her prey and makes the man feel really good about himself (see also Proverbs 6:24,7:5). As the man’s ego grows, so does his sexual appetite. Her verbal persuasions continue by painting a visual picture of what she wants to do and where and how she wants to do it (Proverbs 7:14-18). She is an expert in deception, persuading her prey into believing that there will be no consequences or that the consequences can be avoided (Proverbs 7:19-20). She uses her beauty, her eyes, her body, her clothes, and her words to blur the man’s judgment such that he becomes caught up in the moment (Proverbs 7:10,13). This is why Joseph immediately fled when Potiphar’s wife approached him in a seductive manner (Genesis 39:12) as he recognized that any hesitation on his part would prove seriously dangerous.
Proverbs 5:8 says, “Keep your way far from her and do not go near the door of her house.” Men need to stay as far away from dangerous places as possible, and this starts by controlling their own minds. Proverbs 6:25 says, “Do not desire her beauty in your heart, nor let her capture you with her eyelids.” It is one thing to see a beautiful woman, and it is another altogether to desire her beauty. The indulgence of a thought, mental picture, or flirtation is what gets many men in trouble. Men who play with fire will get burned (Proverbs 6:27).
Men would do well to remember Proverbs 6:26 which says, “For on account of a harlot one is reduced to a loaf of bread, and an adulteress hunts for the precious life.” The seductress is not interested in the well-being of the man, though she may well enjoy seeing him be pleased with her. Her ultimate purpose and intent is to please herself by reducing her prey to a loaf of bread. In other words, she is there for her own appetite, to feast upon the precious life, just as Potiphar’s wife did to Joseph (Genesis 39:6-7). Flattery implies ingenuity and lies for personal gain. This is what the adulteress is all about (Proverbs 7:11-12).
If a man wants to keep himself pure, he needs to drink from his own cistern (Proverbs 5:15). This is why marrying a believer is so crucial because the Holy Spirit can bring harmony, joy, and sexual bliss. Real and satisfying sexual intimacy is a natural outflow of emotional and spiritual intimacy rather than a selfish thought process of “what the other person can do for me.” Immorality will never satisfy, but doing things God’s way always will.
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